I was reading this article on memory and depression and it made me take some time to think about how my memories and memory problems have impacted me.
This has taken a lot of my self esteem, as well as my confidence, and parts of who and what I was/am. I don’t remember ever having a great memory, but it was bad by the time I was in high school, and has just continued to worsen. It’s to the point I have to write things down or post them here on facebook, or constantly reiterate them verbally. It has not helped my OCD, as I start obsessing over the fact I can’t remember things, and I obsess about things that I want to remember. It has not helped my depression, as I feel less and less like a person, and less and less like a functional person. It was not helped me emotionally because of all of the above. And it has not helped me physically because I forget if I’ve done things or not, and I forget if I need to do things (showers go longer than they should at times because I forget, and I try to clean up every day with wipes but there are times where I forget if i’ve done so or not…
That’s just the tip of the iceberg.
There is good as well, but it’s hard to remember or come up with good things.